Oh well, that’s another New Year out of the way and I’m pleased to say that apart from my back giving out at 1 am I had a really excellent night in my local pub. I’ve discovered that having to use crutches does bring some bonuses, especially the way that people are much more helpful and considerate, no matter how pissed they are. I don’t find having doors held open for me degrading in any way, it’s incredibly helpful.
One of the more surprising things that was said last night came from a friend who I don’t see very often but who regularly sees my status updates on Facebook. It’s his opinion that my book project represents great bravery which is something I’ve never considered, I simply believe it to be a story that needs telling and in a way it’s a belated apology to the many people who’s emotions I trampled on during my turbulent childhood and adolescence. His point was that had he been in my situation he’d have suppressed everything and tried to forget about it. I tried that for a long time and look where it got me!
On a selfish note I’ve got a big wish for 2010, I’d like this to be the year that my orthopaedic consultant faces the inevitable and give me a shiny new knee so that I can think about getting rid of the crutches which would be nice.
Love
Your book project is undoubtedly brave, but it’s also a story that needs to be told. For your own sake, and for the rest of us. Sometimes I’m struck with this crazy idea of humanity slowly evolving for the better, that we learn from our mistakes and atrocities. That’s why we all need your book.
I don’t know. Maybe people holding up doors is a sign?? You know, sometimes it happens to me as well – without the use of crutches. And sometimes when I hold up the door to anyone behind me in the metro I hear a ‘thank you’. Maybe there’s hope after all?
Love
Daniel
Daniel
While doing a good deed like holding a door open is supposed to be it’s own reward, isn’t it nice when someone thinks to say thank you. As you say it gives us hope.
One of the main purposes of my book is to show people what can happen if they ignore the signs that something is wrong. I still find it incredible that parents, teachers and so many other people didn’t realise that there was something awfully wrong in my life and that I’d changed from a bright happy boy into a depressed angry one.
Love
Malcolm
Mac you are a brave soul. Anyone who stands forward in the face of adversity is.
I don’t think wanting the shiny new knee is selfish, just human.